How much work can we really do alone?

It is easy in a noisy world to want time alone. It’s easy when your diary is full, your commitments significant, your time short to want to be left alone, to have the autonomy and freedom to just get stuff done or to tell others to just ‘do it’ themselves.

I have talked to hundreds of people in recent months about work load, about lack of time, about how fast the year is travelling, about not coping with where their worlds are hurtling. As a life coach myself, I’ve helped a lot of people work through anxiety and sometimes real fear about coping. I’ve done my best to provide concrete and pragmatic support for sorting the important from the noisy, the critical from the urgent.

I notice that people are endeavouring to cope with the speed of life in general, with the increasingly complex number of demands on their time, whilst at the same time trying to salvage space for health, family, leisure, learning and I notice it’s not getting any easier.

So, here’s what I think life coaching should be focussing on:

  1. We need to talk about what’s happening together
  2. Which ever way you call it, we are a community – in families, at work, in towns, in countries
  3. We could life coach people to be more effective together – less focus on the ‘I’ of life and more on the ‘we’ and ‘us’
  4. We could help people work out what sort of world WE want and how WE should behave together in that world (rather than me or I)
  5. We could create clarity on the implications of ‘I am tired/I have to much on/I am overwhelmed/I can’t cope, to we are tired, we have too much on, we can’t cope – it sounds and feels different doesn’t it?
  6. If we recognise we all feel similar, maybe we can all determine how we want to collaborate more effectively so we live our lives without rushing (but still achieving)
  7. We will do this because we all agree, being alive is better than being dead, and if we are rushing forward, because we are all so busy, and I am worrying about me, where will we all end up?

Collaboration builds businesses, bridges and babies! Collaboration and the life skills that underpin it create galleries, and choirs, aeroplanes and food. Collaboration and the life coaching that builds the skills that enable collaboration, stops wars, transforms governments, helps raise funds to support the hungry, the poor, the disenfranchised, the frightened, those that dream, those that create. Collaboration builds movements that create hope.

“We” not “I” change the world.

I need the life skills to be a bigger part of we, not to cope on my own in a world where we are heading towards a destination that neither we nor I actually want.






Written by Fabian Dattner




Hand image courtesy of Salvatore Vuono /

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